A Message From Pat Robertson and the "Vote No On Jesus" Campaign

McSweeney's Internet Tendency: "He may be the Son of God, but He is no Ronald Reagan. "

Ahh, that old chestnut: How Would Jesus Vote?

Raised by wolves? Monkeys? Dogs?

Feral Children


If you're not sure whether you came by your table manners honestly, search for your name here. Maybe you have the world's greatest excuse for not using cutlery!


Feral children, also known as wolf children, are children who've grown up with minimal human contact, or even none at all. They may have been brought up by animals (often wolves) or somehow survived on their own. In some cases, children are confined and denied normal social interaction with other people.

Europeans are living in a 'dream world' of welfare and long vacations

Hmmm, where do i sign up?

Czech warns Europe of 'dream world' woes - The Washington Times: World: "

Czech President Vaclav Klaus said Europeans are living in a 'dream world' of welfare and long vacations and have yet to realize 'they are not moving toward some sort of nirvana.' "

Pornography foe arrested on prostitution charge

Pornography foe arrested on prostitution charge:

A vice chairman of a Louisville anti-pornography group was arrested Saturday night on a prostitution charge.

Police took John W. Riddle, 65, into custody after seeing him in a car at 17th and Rowan streets with a "known prostitute," according to the arrest report.

McSweeney's Internet Tendency: A Letter That Seems To Be From My Garden Gnomes

I found this to be well worth the read. you might, too...

McSweeney's Internet Tendency: A Letter That Seems To Be From My Garden Gnomes: "A L E T T E R T H A T
S E E M S T O B E F R O M
M Y G A R D E N G N O M E S .

BY TIM CARVELL

- - - -
Dear Michael,
We, your Garden Gnomes, have decided that it is time we let you know the truth: We are alive. This is not a prank. We have been concealing ourselves for some time but have decided, after much examination, since you mercilessly creamed your little nephew in that Cool Whip fight (sorry about the pun) that you are our kind of guy. " .......

Vatican: condoms don't stop Aids

Yikes! Just when you thought that crazy Catholic church had cleaned up its act it starts being even more irresponsible. This would be funny if they weren't effectively murdering people by saying it. huh. Guardian Unlimited | Special reports | Vatican: condoms don't stop Aids: "Vatican: condoms don't stop Aids

Steve Bradshaw
Thursday October 9, 2003
The Guardian

The Catholic Church is telling people in countries stricken by Aids not to use condoms because they have tiny holes in them through which the HIV virus can pass - potentially exposing thousands of people to risk.
The church is making the claims across four continents despite a widespread scientific consensus that condoms are impermeable to the HIV virus.
A senior Vatican spokesman backs the claims about permeable condoms, despite assurances by the World Health Organisation that they are untrue. "

Money for old mice: Competition seeks world's longest-lasting mouse.

Got an old mouse sitting around doing nothing? Now's your chance to trade it in for cold hard cash: From Nature...

Money for old mice: Competition seeks world's longest-lasting mouse.: "A contest to produce the oldest laboratory mouse, and so help to unravel the mysteries of human ageing, is launched in Britain today."

52 projects

Bored this weekend? This will keep you busy all year.

52 projects

Find your old letters. Gather up all of the letters that one of your oldest friends has sent to you over the years. Photocopy the letters. Put the photocopies in an envelope, and then mail off the envelope to your friend.

Low Freq. Sound Haunts a House

So the question is, how do we generate "infrasound" for our halloween party this year?

Reuters | Latest Financial News / Full News Coverage: "Soundless Music Shown to Produce Weird Sensations
Sun September 7, 2003 07:09 PM ET
By Patricia Reaney
MANCHESTER, England (Reuters) - Mysteriously snuffed out candles, weird sensations and shivers down the spine may not be due to the presence of ghosts in haunted houses but to very low frequency sound that is inaudible to humans.
British scientists have shown in a controlled experiment that the extreme bass sound known as infrasound produces a range of bizarre effects in people including anxiety, extreme sorrow and chills -- supporting popular suggestions of a link between infrasound and strange sensations."

Keepers of the Magic Kingdom

When you're weary,
Feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes...

Read this article and know just how great your life is. How very, very great. Amazing. Wonderful.

LA Weekly: Features: Keepers of the Magic Kingdom: "Benji Breitbart doesn’t go to Disneyland every day.
“I wasn’t here last Thursday,” he says as we walk down Main Street. “I usually come six days a week.”
We’re moving quickly. “I have things I need to do,” Benji says. He’s canvassing the park, looking for anything new or out of place."

Ping Pong in the Matrix

best. ping-pong. ever.

Condi's Phony History - Sorry, Dr. Rice, postwar Germany was nothing like Iraq. By Daniel Benjamin

Our administration caught in more lies that I'm sure will never see th e light of day in the mainstream "liberal" media.
sigh.

from Slate
Condi's Phony History - Sorry, Dr. Rice, postwar Germany was nothing like Iraq. By Daniel Benjamin: "So, how did this fanciful version of the American experience in postwar Germany get into the remarks of a Princeton graduate and former trustee of Stanford's Hoover Institute (Rumsfeld) and the former provost of Stanford and co-author of an acclaimed book on German unification (Rice)? Perhaps the British have some intelligence on the matter that still has not been made public. Of course, as the president himself has noted, there is a lot of revisionist history going around."

Zenkey foal a hybrid star - smh.com.au

That's what you get when you keep your donkeys in your zebra pen.

Zenkey foal a hybrid star - smh.com.au
August 29, 2003


A Japanese safari park says it will put a zebra-donkey hybrid, believed to be the world's only living 'zenkey', on public view next week.
'As we keep herbivorous animals without separating them, the unbelievable can happen,' said Osamu Ishikawa, deputy head of Nasu Safari Park, 150 kilometres north of Tokyo.
'A donkey was pregnant and everybody was expecting a donkey foal,' he said, adding that keepers had been surprised to see a striped animal born on August 8.
The male foal, now weighing about 25 kilograms, has ears like a donkey and looks as if it is wearing striped leggings. It also has a black cross mark on its withers characteristic of donkey foals.
Although it is extremely rare, donkeys and zebras can produce offspring because they belong to the same horse family.
Nasu Safari Park has had a naturally-bred zenkey twice before, but they did not live long.
'One, born more than a decade ago, survived only for a few days and the second one died after less than two months,' Mr Ishikawa said. "

Scroll down on this page to "Book & Author Luncheon" and fast forward if you want to watch AL Franken tear poor Bill O'Reilly apart. Its cute.

Book TV.org: "Interviews & Call-Ins
LIVE 2:30-3pm ET/11:30-12pm PT

Book & Author Luncheon
Watch 1 hr. 29 mins.
Al Franken, 'Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right'
Molly Ivins, 'Bushwhacked'
Bill O'Reilly, 'Who's Looking Out for You?'
Pat Schroeder, Assn. of American Publishers, President & CEO - Moderator"

More miraculous Red Wine News. Is there anything it can't do?

Yahoo! News - Study: Red Wine Molecule Shown to Extend Life: "Study: Red Wine Molecule Shown to Extend Life
Sun Aug 24, 4:17 PM


By Greg Frost
BOSTON (Reuters) - Researchers have known for years that cutting calories can prolong life in everything from yeast cells to mammals. But an easier way to live longer may be as simple as turning a corkscrew.

Molecules found in red wine, peanuts and other products of the plant world have for the first time been shown to mimic the life-extending effects of calorie restriction, a finding that could help researchers develop drugs that lengthen life and prevent or treat aging-related diseases. "

How cool is this. Can't quite place where that person is from? Maybe you can after you've heard their countrymen saying:

"Please call Stella. Ask her to bring these things with her from the store: Six spoons of fresh snow peas, five thick slabs of blue cheese, and maybe a snack for her brother Bob. We also need a small plastic snake and a big toy frog for the kids. She can scoop these things into three red bags, and we will go meet her Wednesday at the train station."

speech accent archive: "speech accent archive

This site examines the accented speech of speakers from many different language backgrounds reading the same sample paragraph. Currently, we have obtained 264 speech samples. To explore the features of this site, use the pull-down menu below. "

These are getting harder. I figured out the puzzle 2 weeks ago, but not sure I'm up to this one... any ideas:

The first person who can tell us what the numbers and letters below refer to, represent, or have in common with each other will receive two McSweeney's books.

McSweeney's Internet Tendency: McSweeney's Brain Exploder: Pittsburgh Puzzle Parry-In-A-Pen Match: "Let's Git it On!": "JG43, RH46, ET56, LC58, SD59, DM97, AJ98, JL03"

Those wacky Chinese scientists. Forget about making a taller child for yourself with growth hormone, go straight for the Flop-Eared variety!!!!!

Cloning Yields Human-Rabbit Hybrid Embryo (washingtonpost.com): "Cloning Yields Human-Rabbit Hybrid Embryo

By Rick Weiss
Washington Post Staff Writer
Thursday, August 14, 2003; Page A04
Scientists in China have, for the first time, used cloning techniques to create hybrid embryos that contain a mix of DNA from both humans and rabbits, according to a report in a scientific journal that has reignited the smoldering ethics debate over cloning research.



More than 100 of the hybrids, made by fusing human skin cells with rabbit eggs, were allowed to develop in laboratory dishes for several days before the scientists destroyed them to retrieve so-called embryonic stem cells from their interiors. Although scientists in Massachusetts had previously mixed human cells and cow eggs in a similar attempt to make hybrid embryos as a source of stem cells, those experiments were not successful. "

Getting enough sleep these days? I was reminded by this story that I stayed up until 5am on Saturday. Its a wonder I slept at all.

McSweeney's Internet Tendency: I Enjoy Taunting Insomniacs

Who says crows are stupid? not me. Legend has it this captive crow first performed the bendy trick spontaneously.

See the video here!

about time! Collect them all...

Axis of Weasels: "Axis of Weasels Art Cards
Hand printed lino-cut prints by John Steins
click on image/name for description"

Psychology today finally figures out the difference between men and women, or, things we already knew but were afraid to say...


Psychology Today: The New Sex Scorecard: "The New Sex Scorecard
By Hara Marano -- Publication Date: Jul/Aug 2003

Summary: Talking openly about sex differences is no longer an exercise in political incorrectness; it is a necessity in fighting disease and forging successful relationships. AT 109 and counting, PT examines the tally. "

And I thought all those Linux-Heads were just a bunch of cranks. I am interested in this man's theories. I want to subscribe to his newsletter...
Saving the Net: "The Founding Fathers wanted that term to be 14 years, with an additional 14 years if the author [was] still alive. After 28 years, they figured you'd had your chance to exploit your creation, and now it belonged to the nation at large. That way we would never end up with a system of hereditary privilege, similar to the printers guilds of Renaissance England, who tied up rights to dead authors and tightly controlled what could or could not be printed and who could or could not use literary material.
In America, land of free ideas as well as free people, this would never happen, they said.
Well, it's happened. It's happened because for years now Congress has allowed it to happen. We now have an exact replica of the medieval Stationers' Company, which controlled the English copyrights, only its names today are Disney, Bertelsmann, and AOL Time Warner. The big media companies, holding the copyrights of dead authors, have said, in effect, that Jefferson, Madison, and Hamilton were wrong and that we should go back to the aristocratic system of hereditary ownership, granting copyrights in perpetuity. To effect this result, they've liberally greased the palms of Congressmen in the form of campaign contributions--and it's worked... "

Well that's what you get for skipping gym class!!!

The Harvard Crimson Online :: News: "Harvard has revoked its admission of Blair Hornstine, the prospective member of the Class of 2007 who made national headlines when she sued her school system to ensure she would be her high school’s sole valedictorian.
Following a widely-publicized report that Hornstine had plagiarized material in articles she wrote for her local paper, the Harvard admissions office has rescinded her offer to attend Harvard in the fall, according to a source involved with the decision."

So now we know the origin of the whole beck album thing. eh chums?Yahoo! Reference - Search Results: "William Shakespeare (1564-1616)
Full fathom five thy father lies;
Of his bones are coral made;
Those are pearls that were his eyes:
Nothing of him that doth fade
But doth suffer a sea-change
Into something rich and strange.
The Tempest. Act i. Sc. 2. "

wow. for $20 you can stop jud from editing your email. $20!!!

PawSense helps you catproof your computer.: "When cats walk or climb on your keyboard, they can enter random commands and data, damage your files, and even crash your computer. This can happen whether you are near the computer or have suddenly been called away from it.
PawSense is a software utility that helps protect your computer from cats. It quickly detects and blocks cat typing, and also helps train your cat to stay off the computer keyboard. "

Truly truly brilliant. Must travel outside the US at least once before GW is out of office!
-bill

American Apology Shirt: "Aufrecht.org presents: American Traveler International Apology Shirt

Washington State voters of all political orientations: you have until Friday (27 Jun 2003) to Contact Governer Gary Locke and Sec. of State Sam Reed to tell them to require by law that the new voting machines we're getting print out a physical ballot for the voter to verify and can be upgraded to instant runoff and other more sophisticated methods.
Buy the shirt, then Fix The System. Go to Fair Vote Network and get involved in election reform in your state.


I was preparing for an international trip, and I thought, 'what can I do tell as many people as possible in other countries that many Americans vehemently disagree with the policies of our own government?' So I made this shirt, and various wonderful people translated it into all of the official UN languages, Arabic, Chinese, English, French, Spanish, and Russian. Buy one for your own international travels. A domestic version (US$16), without English, is also available for those who want to make a statement, but not to monolingual locals. "

Welcome to my new blog. I know blogs are for losers and blah blah blog. Hey, if it works it works and if it doesn't I'll delete it and we'll all never ever talk about it again.

-bill